Day two of the second pass through all the games of the Browsercade.
-=-=-
Another, slightly quicker, roundup of the games I worked on, yesterday.
1. Kick Kick Mushroom - Seems fine
This needed more of those "reused globals" fixes, but wasn't too bad.
2. Scatterbugs in Space - Seems fine
Nothing to worry about here. This game didn't have any issues at all!
3. Cal Lambity - Seems fine
No issues here, either.
4. Well Defended - Seems fine, but watch out for Sprite-Quirk
Sprite-Quirk keeps popping up.
That's when the spritesheet loader isn't quite ready before the game starts.
I might have to add a couple of frames of delay every time I load an image or something?
5. Willy Bomber - Seems fine, but deserves better
This is one of the few games that I've come across where I've thought "This oughta be bigger than it is."
I might take some time at the end of doing all this, to fix this, and Orret Cha, to make them a bit more lively.
6. River Rapids - Seems fine
The background/water on this wasn't rescaling when the game was being restarted.
I honestly thought ResetDraw was being automatically triggered at the start of every loop, but I guess not.
Hmm.
7. Not Pong - Seems fine - Needed a lot of scaling tweaks.
This was a VERY broken game, and I'm not really sure why it was as broken as it was.
I think it might've been a disjoint between what the menu thinks the screen resolution is, vs what the game thinks the screen resolution is.
.. But I couldn't say for sure.
Odd.
But it's working, now.
8. Polldrop - Seems fine
Nothing wrong with this game, albeit a little bit blander than I'd like.
9. Circle vs Jellyfish - Seems fine - Still getting the Sprite-Quirk
Another occasion when the Sprite-Quirk popped up, and neither the circle nor the jellyfish would show up at times.
Really odd.
10. Flipping Floors - Scaled rectangle was wrong
There's a semi-transparent darkened rectangle drawn over the background in this game, so that the platforms are more obvious, but it was scaling incorrectly due to the copy+pasted drawing functions.
I've fixed this.
11. Gast-o-Naut - Seems fine (bit shit!)
This game's rather slow, but .. at least it works!
12. Rumbled Ground - Seems fine
LOL. I forgot how fun this game is.
13. Meatballs in Space - Needed another variable-reuse tweak.
Seriously, I need to learn how to write functions better, and not reuse the same globals for everything
14. Flappadiddle - Needed a reset of sprite flipping!
The sprite flipping bug really wasn't noticeable before. It's been there this whole entire time, but 95% of the sprites in the game are symmetrical, so you couldn't tell.
Now that the new JSE drawing code has been implemented, you can see that the Bonus Timer was being flipped when Flappy was facing left.
Oops!
Fixed that.
15. Really Retro Racing - Seems fine
This game is rather silly, isn't it?
And that brought me to Greenie's Heroic Adventure, which used to look like this.
But now looks like this...
Which, I think we can all agree, is ever so slightly broken!
I'll be tackling that, and no doubt more of Browsercade, later today.
Meanwhile..
Awww, Swans
We walked to the canal yesterday.
3,552 steps there and back. Took about an hour, and is a mile there and back.. So..
.. 1 mph.
Woot.
It's finally getting a bit cooler, here in the UK, so I can get out and about again without my brain melting.
I'll leave the brain melting for all the game fixes.
[verse]
Kick, Kick, Kick, Kick a mushroom, Kick it. (woo)
I fixed more games in the browsercade, did it. (yeah)
The bugs in space with their spikes did die,
And the lamb, off it ran, to the left, it did try.
[chorus]
Fixes come, and fixes go.
Fix those games, and let them roar.
Fixing fixing, all the code,
Fix them up, both young and old.
Fix the things that you did brake,
Fixing helps them not to flake.
Fix fix the fix that foxes it.
Fix fix fox fix flicks forks fix.
[breakdown]
[verse]
The well's well defended like never before,
And Willy with his bombs can now explore.
The speedboat speeds through the rapids once more,
And the pong isn't pong, no it's never really pong. (pong)
[chorus]
Fixes come, and fixes go.
Fix those games, and let them roar.
Fixing fixing, all the code,
Fix them up, both young and old.
Fix the things that you did brake,
Fixing helps them not to flake.
Fix fix the fix that foxes it.
Fix fix fox fix flicks forks fix.
[breakdown]
[verse]
Drop down the poll, slide down, slide slide
To the jellyfish, run, shoot the circle, bang bang
Flipping floors, flip, flippity flipy flip
Aaaaaah, flip! (oh flip, flip)
[chorus]
Fixes come, and fixes go.
Fix those games, and let them roar.
Fixing fixing, all the code,
Fix them up, both young and old.
Fix the things that you did brake,
Fixing helps them not to flake.
Fix fix the fix that foxes it.
Fix fix fox fix flicks forks fix.
[verse]
There's something under the ground. It's running towards you.
Shoot it, shoot it, kill kill kill
It's a giant meatball. Oh my god it's a meatball!
It's going to eat me. Aargh!
[chorus]
Fixes come, and fixes go.
Fix those games, and let them roar.
Fixing fixing, all the code,
Fix them up, both young and old.
Fix the things that you did brake,
Fixing helps them not to flake.
Fix fix the fix that foxes it.
Fix fix fox fix flicks forks fix.
[verse]
Flap, flap, flap, flap, flap.
Fly gently through the maze of spikes.
And watch for the cars as they race along.
While they rev their engines to a crazy song..
[chorus]
Fixes come, and fixes go.
Fix those games, and let them roar.
Fixing fixing, all the code,
Fix them up, both young and old.
Fix the things that you did brake,
Fixing helps them not to flake.
Fix fix the fix that foxes it.
Fix fix fox fix flicks forks fix.
Which I then passed to ChatGPT and asked it to "corrupt" the lyrics, which resulted in.. > Reveal 🔎
[verse 1]
K-k-kickâkick. Ki? Ki-kikiâmushroom mushroom mushmooâkick-it. (woo?..woops)
I⊠fixxed⊠framsâgrapes?âgraaamesâin theâB-B-BR-R-rowser cr8 (cadecadecade!)
The bugs⊠in spa-spay-SPACE... died did died d-dead yes.
And the lamb, the lamb... ran! or? left? noâLEFT! LEAPT! (lef-leff-leftified)
[chorus]
Fix come⊠fixes... fo-go-gone? (where go?)
FixthemfixthosethoseâGAHH!âLET 'EMâRRRrrrrgghh... rawwWR! (error scream)
Fixinâ fixinââcook?ânoâC-c-c-code [code confirmed]
Fix it uppppp... then down... then... sideways maybe
Fix the yây-young ânââooold ânââbold? (bold old sold gold?)
Fix itâbr-br-broke itâbreak-edâbroken-ing.
Help helps the flake flakes flakeflakeflakeflakeâ
Fi-fix the fix thatâbox?ânoâfox foxâboxed the fix?
Fixfoxfoxflickityforkfork⊠fix! (forks again⊠ugh)
[verse 2]
The well is... WELL is... well well well wellâding! [status: brimming]
Willy? YES! W-Will! With bomb-things! He âsplores. Boom boom boom (booo?)
Speedy speedboat speeeeeeeeeeds spâspitspitspeedsârepeat!
Pongâs gone. It was pong. Now it's notpong neverpong. (is it pong? pongy pong?)
[chorus]
Fix comeâfix comeâfixfixgooo [off key: GOOOOO]
Fix thoseâgahâthoseâGAHGAH GAAAAMES! (gurgling static)
Fix in the code! Fix out the code! Fix... behind code?
Up down down down UP⊠or age⊠young? no? yes? ok. (youngagecodeold)
Brake breaky broke, no, no, break-fake.
Fox flake... flick fix... flox?
Fix fix fix fixity forked-for-fork fork FIX.
(squeaky voice: flick flickity fox fix fix forks fixxâzap!)
[breakdown]
[dial-up tone, badly impersonated by a voice]
"Verâverâverse... integrity⊠irretrievable."
(cascading 'fix' whispers, echoing like a choir trapped in a toaster)
[verse 3]
Drop down theâpullâpoleâportal?âSlllllide down (weeeee)
Sssssslide slideâjellyfish fish fish fishâdishâBANGBANG
Shooty circl-y! Cir-shoot! Sploosh! Blam! Oops!
Floor go fl-fl-flip... floor flip flip flip!
AAAAAAAAH! FLORP!! (Oh flip flip flâAAA!)
[chorus]
Fix... itâs⊠itâs⊠it comes? it went? (who knows??)
Fix those GAâGAGâGAGA-games (pop star?)
Fix it up, down, spin it like toast! Code EXPLODES!
Fix the age rage stage page gauge (young-n-old-n-bold-n-gold)
Fix what brokeded the fixer that foxed it
Fox broke the flake forkâfork flick fix!
fizz-bzzz-click (forkfix again, again, again)
[verse 4]
Under-something... or... maybe⊠down below?
Run RUN run-run-run-runrun! SHOOT itâshoutâkill itâkillit!
Ki-ki-ki-kill-kill-it-it-itâs...
âŠitâs a⊠what? no! itâs a MEATBALLLLL!!! (MEAAAAATBAAAAAALL)
ITâS COMING, COMING, OH, OHH NO, NOOOO
Aaaarghâ[VOCAL STREAM INTERRUPTED]âmeatball wins
[chorus]
F⊠fix? fixxxit. Fix it. Fix fix. (fix me.)
Fix gameâgamey gamesssssâgummy games.
Code go load explode node toad! (no toads!)
Fix the young. Fix the age. Fix the... garage?
Break the broke. Brake the break. Bake the cake??
Fix the fix you fixed to fix whatâs fake. (real fake real)
Fix it.
FoxâŠish.
Forkity flick fox fix fixity fix fix fix. (and tap tap. and tap tap.)
[Dave and Green are laboriously copying highscores from arcade machines into Dave's laptop]
Dave: 12345678? That can't be a real score. Has someone been cheating at Marble Madness?
Green: Maybe they're just better at it than you are.
Dave: That's not possible, is it? Does it even go up in single digits like that?
Green: It's not our place to judge the scores.
Dave: Nobody's that good, though! Look at the pattern - it's just counting up!
Green: Well, yeah, that's what highscores tend to do.
Dave: Not like that, though. 12345676, 12345677 and 12345678?
Green: You never know. They might just be eeking out one extra point, each time.
Mrs Thompson: What are you two arguing about now?
Dave: Someone's been hacking fake high scores into the arcade machines!
Green: Dave's having a meltdown because he's not top of any leaderboard.
Dave: I could be! If people would stop cheating!
Mrs Thompson: Have you considered that maybe some people are just better at games?
Dave: Not you too! Look - Galaxian, 987654321. Defender, 88888888. This is clearly suspicious!
[Dave starts frantically typing]
Green: What are you doing now?
Dave: Creating an algorithm to detect suspicious scoring patterns.
Green: Oh god, not another spreadsheet formula.
Dave: This will revolutionise arcade integrity!
Green: Next thing you'll be putting little camera attached to the screen to ensure "proper gameplay"
Dave: Oooh, oooh, the Security ScrunchCake Sentinel. He already has cameras!
Mrs Thompson: [walking away rapidly] Have fun, you two.
[End Credits Roll]
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